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The Sunday Sermon; The Myth of Endings.

November 17, 2015

Sometimes, it's just a cigar

Endings are something I have struggled with all my life. Its one of those issues where knowing the why doesn’t always help with the how. My childhood had a number of “disappearances” forced endings that left me feeling as if anything or anyone I cared about might crumble into dust at any time. Its caused me to prefer to disappear myself, often drifting away from a group or situation since the alternative is to allow myself to grow close enough to be, once again, abandoned.

When you assume that loosing what you care about is the default, loss takes on a different flavour. Its almost as if you live in a contradiction, waiting to be once more bereft whilst holding yourself back from the engagement and relationships which might cause you to be hurt again.

Its a lonely place, created out of loneliness. An emptiness that grows from the fear…

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  1. Talking of endings… | Braindroppings

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